he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
