he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
should my penis look like a turkey
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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