she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
try to milk me bitch
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