let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Dear god my vagina.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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