worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Everything about him screamed your future.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
We talked him into tasing himself.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
