proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize