SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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