You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize