Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
