And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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