I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
