she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
My boob is missing a layer of skin
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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