i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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