dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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