We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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