Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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