operation harelip BJ is a go
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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