big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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