her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize