If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
