I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
