i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize