I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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