I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize