talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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