Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Randomize
