I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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