oh fat girl friday strikes again...
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
