Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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