i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
