I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
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