he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Randomize
