is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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