I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
