Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize
