your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
