P.S. I can't hear my feet
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize
