Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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