I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
