just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
