i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
