How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize