question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
