so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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