who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I think i peed on brittanys purse
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
