I wish my penis had an off switch
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
