I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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