It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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