I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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