i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
