You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
