youre lurking in front of me
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
