I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
